Praline Elephants;
After Jenny Joseph's warning.
When I’m an old bag lady
You’d better shift
I’ll never wash my hair or self
I’ll have nits and fleas and be very
Unsociable to be around.
I’ll sleep in the dog basket
In a barn
And eat things people throw in bins
When I’m an old bag.
You will be an old bum
An old hobo
And wear the same set of clothes
All the time
And drink out of a brown paper bag
Just for fun.
And read all day and make fires
And burn all the furniture all night
And you’ll never call be darling
But witch or hag or old cow.
And I’ll answer because sometimes
There is glee to be got in being uncouth
I’ll have big silver streaks up
My sleeve where I’ve wiped my nose when it runs
And old food down my dress.
Everything will be so mucky
And will have a shine of worn grease
Just right for keeping the rain off.
And we’ll never ever be cold because
There is always furniture to burn
And I’ll wear a sleeping bag for a coat
And five socks and wellies for shoes
And four skirts for extra warmth
And vests and jumpers and body warmers
And a dressing gown with a zip
With a fur coat on top, fake fur
And I’ll have a parrot called Georgie
on one shoulder and a chameleon
on the other and he won’t know what
Colour to go because I have that much stuff on.
And life will be sweetened with
Praline elephants and savoury with
Steak and ale pie and we’ll drink a
Lot of tea.
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